From Stands to Fans: How to Win Over the Spectator Seller
- Sally Luehman
- Sep 7, 2025
- 3 min read
Updated: Nov 25, 2025
Selling real estate is not for the faint of heart. An agent is in the arena every day—dust, sweat, and sometimes even blood—writing offers, negotiating, marketing, handling inspections, dealing with lenders, and fielding calls at all hours.
What could be true: most sellers don’t see the arena. They see the stands. They see the game from a distance, and sometimes, that perspective turns into judgment.
“Why hasn’t my home sold yet?”“Why didn’t we get an offer at list price?”“Why isn’t my agent advertising more?”
It’s human nature for a seller to judge when things feel uncertain. But judgment is easy—it costs nothing. Taking ownership, doing the work, and standing in the arena? That’s where the real value lives.
The Agent in the Arena
Think of Teddy Roosevelt’s words:
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles… The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood…”
That’s the real estate agent. Not the seller watching from the sidelines, not the neighbor gossiping about the asking price, not the uncle at Thanksgiving with his “real estate advice.” The agent is the one showing up every day, putting their name, reputation, and energy on the line to get the house sold.
When Sellers Sit in the Stands
When sellers fall into judgment, they’re often driven by fear, frustration, or unmet expectations. They want results—but instead of stepping into the process, they sit back and critique.
They judge marketing before it has time to work.
They point fingers at pricing when the market feedback isn’t what they hoped.
They blame the agent instead of partnering to solve problems.
Turning a Spectator into a Raving Fan
Here’s where the best agents shine. Instead of fighting judgment, they convert it into partnership.
Tips for Agents:
Acknowledge the Stands.Let the seller know you hear their concerns. Don’t dismiss their judgment—validate it, but redirect it. “I understand it feels frustrating when we don’t have an offer yet. Let’s look at the activity and see what the data is telling us.”
Pull Them Into the Arena. Involve them in the process. Communicate more and share showing feedback, market updates, and strategy adjustments. The more they see the fight you’re in, the less they feel like passive spectators.
Use the Model.When sellers fall into judgment, help them reframe:
Circumstance: 10 showings, no offers.
Thought: “No one wants my house.” → leads to hopelessness.
Reframe Thought: “We’ve had good traffic—now we need to adjust the price to get offers.” → leads to action.
Set Expectations Early.
Make it clear from the start that selling a home is rarely perfect and almost always emotional. Tell them up front: there will be dust, sweat, and sometimes setbacks—but you’ll be in the arena fighting for them the entire way.
Remind Them Who’s Risking the Dust and Sweat.Sometimes, you have to gently remind sellers: “My name, reputation, and resources are on the line every day to get your home sold. I’m in the arena fighting for this with you.”
The Result: From Critic to Champion
When you acknowledge, involve, and redirect your sellers, something shifts. Instead of critics in the stands, they become partners in the arena. And when the dust settles and the house sells, those same once-critical sellers become your loudest raving fans—referring friends, writing glowing reviews, and celebrating you for being the one who had the courage to step into the fight. Keep Fighting.
Empowering women, one thought at a time.
Sally Luehman
Founder & Mindset Coach, Headquarters Coaching LLC
Business Coaching for Women Entrepreneurs
📞 608-547-8098
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